A critical component for confidence |
Up and Over; Five
Strategies to Boost Your Confidence
Struggling with
confidence? Tired of self-defeating thoughts taking over every cell of your
being? In a slump looking for a boost to get you back on track? We’ve all been
there so know that you are in good company. No matter the origins of the loss
of self-esteem or confidence, stress or case of the blahs it is critical to
take charge to move up and over through a difficult time. While it would be
great to think about someone else coming in and saving the day, helping you
feel better, make you feel worthy, this boost to your confidence starts with
you. And you can do it.
Below are 5
strategies from my e-book Up and Over; Boost Your Confidence
When None is to be Found,
#1 Breathe
As
super simple as this sounds, for those who are sinking, overwhelmed or stressed
remembering to take a deep, opening breath is pretty important. There is a
reason that this is the number 1 strategy. The depth and richness of your
breath is what will start to give you a boost to your confidence.
As
an extra, I often send myself an e-mail or put post-it notes around my desk and
in my car to remind me to breathe. And I really like tweeting out a reminder to
breathe – it always gets retweeted or favorite and makes me feel like I have
helped someone else too. More strategies about breathing and reminders to breathe
are covered in Chapter 1 of Up and Over. Fill your life with deep rich breaths
and fill yourself with life-affirming confidence.
#2 Create Cue
Cards
Cue
cards are often used in television, plays and other public performances to help
the actors or speakers keep track of their place, where they want to go and
where they need to be. So often when we are involved in the moment, the passion
or drama of what is happening it is easy to let adrenaline or emotions take
over and lose our place.
While
a little passion and adrenaline is not bad and can aid a performance, allowing
that emotion or drama to sidetrack the speaker can be quite disturbing for both
the presenter and the audience. So understanding that getting sidetracked is a
common and usual part of the job, cue cards are used to keep us on track. The
same can be said for helping us stay on track in anything we want to accomplish
or move toward – so let’s create cue cards to help stay focused on boosting
confidence.
You
can have a lot of fun creating confidence cue cards that remind you to be
grateful, be thankful, be patient, and one of my favorites is to create a
mission-driven cue card:
Write
down your mission in life and post it everywhere as a reminder, and reflect on
your mission cue card daily. If you don’t have your mission clear in your mind,
there are exercises in Chapter 2 of Up and Over to help you have fun with
identifying and connecting with your mission. Cue
cards provide a reminder of what we and others appreciate about ourselves and
each other.
#3
Move
There’s
a reason that the term “moving forward” is used to describe positive
progression toward something – just the sheer act of moving will help boost
your confidence. It does not matter if it is walking or doing gentle yoga for a
few minutes or marathon bouts of Zumba or spinning, the act of moving counteracts
a physiological response to being stuck in “frozen mode” so characteristically
known as the fright portion of the “flight or fright” response to stress.
So
many confidence defeating responses happen when stuck in frozen mode so
anything you can do to move forward out of fright mode will help boost your
confidence, anything; so go ahead and get started now. Start slowly, do one
thing, start somewhere and add movement to your moment. Here are just a few strategies
from Up and Over to help move you forward.
·
Go
to a playground and swing on swings, slide down the slide, twirl on the
carousel or hang upside down on the jungle gym.
·
Blow
up a bunch of balloons and see how many you can keep in the air at one time.
·
Vacuum,
get into it vigorously getting all of the dust specks hidden in the curtains,
behind doors, move chairs, cushions and couches and get under those hard to
reach areas. And then enjoy looking at all you have accomplished. Start
somewhere and just move.
#
4 Give
When
experiencing a lack of confidence, nothing will boost it quicker and painlessly
than giving. The act of giving helps to move our thoughts away from ourselves
and toward someone else, creating movement of focus and energy. And identifying
that someone may need or want something that we have to offer provides an
immediate boost to self-worth.
The
gift can be simple, a kindness, an action, a thought shared with another; its
main components are to be genuine and intentional. I wrote a book called One Hundred Days of Giving which
is loaded with ideas and inspiration for giving opportunities, most with no
financial expectations, simply fun and creative ways to give and to provide a
meaningful experience for someone else. Here are a few ideas from Up and Over:
·
Bake
an extra batch of cookies or lasagna and take them to your neighbor, or someone
you know who is alone or is struggling.
·
Put
some spare change in someone else’s parking meter.
·
Volunteer
to help at your local food shelf or animal shelter or other organization where
your time is indispensable and valuable.
#5
Act As If
Fake
it. Yes fake it. And then fake it until you make it. This is the point where
the rubber hits the road…the toughest test, the point at which when there is no
confidence to be found it is critical to “act as if.” Act as if you have
confidence, act as if you feel worthy, act as if you are worthy.
It
will make a difference. Our hearts hurt, our cells are screaming with lessons,
old baggage that is working like crazy to pull us down and it is SO easy not
only to ignore the research but to use it to hurt ourselves further.
It
is critical that when we are this low, feeling this crisis of confidence, that
we need to dust off that persona, that actor in all of us and go out there and
act as if we have confidence. Even if it is for time limited performances. The
rush of the applause when we do a great acting job will help create an up and
over moment, will create some momentum and then you know what to do…pull out a
strategy from any of the other previous chapters in this book and start working
the program again.
Up
and Over is filled with practical tips and exercises to help you keep moving
one foot in front of another when getting out of bed is a chore; strategies for
boosting your confidence when there is none to be found and ideas for helping
you move up and over when you are wavering at the brink of confidence.
You
can choose confidence and these simple
suggestions will help you do just that. Try one, try two, modify one, add your
own, whatever you do, just do something, one thing, and then the next and then
the next and before you know it - you will at least be acting “as if” you are
filled with confidence, and then, even you, will begin believing it yourself.
Kathy
Stutzman is a writer and world citizen who works to create meaningful connections
between people. Her new e-book Up and Over: Boost Your Confidence When None is
to be Found was published in June 2014 and is available at: Up
and Over on Amazon or Up
and Over on Smashwords you can find
her at www.KathyStutzman.blogspot.com
or on Twitter @KathyStutzman. One Hundred
Days of Giving is available at Amazon
3 comments:
Thank you for writing and sharing your book with the world. I loved the part about physically moving to boost your confidence. The 'negative thoughts' bubble popping excercise sounds fun too haha. :)
Thank you for your kinds words Samantha, I am glad you found the book helpful and look forward to hearing about how you find ways to use the strategies to boost your confidence. Enjoy!
You're welcome Kathy. :) I will keep you updated with my confidence progression.
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